We went out and got bakery fresh donuts for breakfast, then ran to the "sos" to get my registration renewed, and then went down to great lakes to do a little shopping. We did way more walking than shopping, but it was fun. Then we came home, slept, and then I got up and made a quirky little cake. It was meant to turn out way better than it actually did, but I slept later than I should have. Then some friends came over and we had an awesome time. All in all it was nice.
But that's not what's on my mind tonight.
Sparing you most of the details, I talked to my dad tonight, and it's to the point where they need to look into selling the house. Not that any of us has been particularly attached to the house, but I'm absolutely heartbroken. My father is a good man. He's always been a hard worker, dedicated to whatever job he worked, willing to do what was needed. His company asked him to fly away from his family for 3 months to go get training? He did it. His company asked him to spend almost a year learning the ins and outs of project management, memorizing things night after night, reading books that no rational human would want to read. He did it. They asked my dad to drive hundreds of miles per week and spend 5 out of 7 days a week away from his family for another year. He did it. And in the end, my dad was a casualty to the bottom line, and his job given to Al Tahmoud in India. Thank you IBM, I appreciate all the crap you've put us through.
My dad is a great man, and he cannot find a job. I understand that he doesn't have a bachelor's degree, let alone a master's, but in the day when he went to school, fantastically expensive pieces of paper weren't as necessary. He has a two year degree, with over twenty-five years of work experience. Over twenty-five years, twenty-two of which were with the same company. It's not that he hasn't looked. It's not that he's unwilling to take jobs that don't pay what he was making. It's not that he's picky.
I don't understand. I don't understand why no one will hire him. He's an intelligent, charismatic man. I don't understand why someone like him is allowed to struggle, to dig and come up empty, when people who cannot even be accountable for their actions are allowed to live in luxury.
Am I bitter? Well, yes. I admit that I am. It's incredibly hard for me to see people living amply without a stitch of gratitude when I know what's happening to my family. I want to scream at them, tell them that their vanities are ... so vain.
It's just not fair. If my family has to struggle, why then, can't I at least be allowed to have enough to save them? Why do I have to sit here helplessly, caught in the middle, unable to do anything? If I could at least help ...
It's the stark contrast between my inlaws and my parents that hurts the most. I hate to see my inlaws making "improvements" on an already wonderful house, talking about things like new sinks and granite countertops. I hate to see them taking it all for granted.
There is one place that has expressed interest in my dad - back in April. They said they would contact him in May, in May, they said they'd talk to him in June...but that they're interested.
... It's all I have to cling to, this one tiny hope that could save them.
And all I can do is sit and wait.
Wait to die, wait to live, wait for an absolution that would never come. (Titanic)
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